It’s a big world out there, and it’s scary. I know, I’m supposed to say it’s a wonderful world, I should probably sing it with a familiar and charming hoarseness, but I’d rather not, at least not today.
Everything big is scary because it looks stronger than you and you know it can crush you, break you or make you disappear. Whatever IT is it can do it, just because it’s bigger.
Being idiotically optimistic from birth, I believe that the world doesn’t really want to hurt me, but still, just in case, I look for escape routes and wonder if there is a dodge one can use when feeling particularly small and weak. An old story from nineteenth century comes to mind. It taught how to deal with a bear if you were unlucky enough to meet one in the forest.
There are two ways to avoid unpleasant results of this awkward acquaintance. First is to lie quietly on the ground trying not to breathe and pretending dead: bears have no appetite for the rotten flesh. You have to be a really good actor for this, I’m afraid, or quite a phlegmatic person for the bear might have a wish to sniff you before leaving for another date.
The other trick sounds a bit funnier but also requires some guts. You need to stand up on your tiptoe and lift your arms as high as possible so the bear thinks you are bigger than him. Bears are just like us; they respect the size and are afraid of anything that is bigger than them. Again, some acting skills would be useful. If you’re an experienced showoff it also might help.
Now, if you think of the world as a very big bear you can use one of those tricks and play dead or play giant to convince it that you are not as small as it seems. Make your choice and use the trick, you will need it. It’s a big world out there, and it’s waiting for ya. I think I’d risk to go for the show-off competition. It seems to be more exciting this way.