I read somewhere that the worst thing you can do in life is to lie to yourself. When you lie to someone else it’s probably not the best thing, but often it’s rather controversial than really bad.
There are so many situations when we use a lie to avoid painful or uncomfortable issues. We lie not only to defend ourselves when we are wrong; most of all we lie when we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings. If a friend of yours asks if he or she gained weight and you can see, yes, he or she did, you say, “No, I haven’t noticed anything like that“. You lie because you know that the spoken truth won’t change anything, your friend won’t become thinner but only will feel hurt.
When you lie to yourself it’s a different story even though you want the same, you want to avoid unpleasant situations, you want to run from truth that causes your pain. But as a result you harm yourself closing the window that shows the whole picture, that reveals things the way they are. And when you are blind like this how can you find the means to fix anything that makes you unhappy?
We all sometimes behave like an ostrich hiding its head in the sand, even though we know that things that scare us won’t go away just because we closed our eyes.
I see people playing this ostrich game all the time. Mostly they are afraid to see that their problems are results of their own actions and they keep blaming the others and making the same mistakes over and over again. This is a vicious circle where you can get stuck forever.
I’ve been there myself, in the spot where I blamed the whole world for my own stupidity. And nobody helped me out, nobody could tell me the truth as people who love you lie to you, this is how they take care of you, they don’t want to hurt you. That is why you can’t lie to yourself.
It can be painful, of course, to see the truth, but recognizing your mistakes will make you learn and avoid them in the future. You are the one to have your eyes open if you don’t want to spend all your life hiding your head in the sand and holding your ass high up in the air. It must be the other way around even if it’s not an easy thing to do.